Yesterday evening, I received an unsolicited email from someone I don’t know. What follows is his entire email, other than his name and address:
“WOULD YOU CONSIDER Doing a 30-minute webinar for real estate agents on Monday, August 2, at 10 a.m. Central time U.S., 4 p.m. London. And talk about marketing in today’s world!”
The email came through, while I was working on the new design for my Tech News Blog, so rather than delete it, I took a 5 minute break and replied.
I wanted to know why on earth he assumed that I would “do a webinar” for someone I have never heard of and why he thought I would be available at zero notice – So I asked him. After all, I run a busy marketing business and my time is usually booked weeks in advance. Heck, a few weeks ago I was a 20 minute drive away from Chris Brogan, a guy I would love to meet, and literally didn’t have the time to hook up when he asked me to visit with him.
So, as I say, I decided to ask the emailer what made him send that email to me.
He replied that; “if I didn’t ask, I wouldn’t know.”
Using that same logic, you would go into your local Starbucks and randomly ask people if they will give you their laptops or phones – After all, “If you don’t ask, you won’t know!” Of course, in both cases, the person’s reputation is likely to be ruined long before they get what they are demanding.
Typically in business, people do not respond well to demands from total strangers. One of the reasons social networking has been such a popular marketing tool, is that it allows us to build relationships with people. We can connect via Twitter, for example, then exchange emails or arrange a phone call. Of course, that approach requires a little time and attention. It’s a 2 way conversation.
It has often been said that you can get whatever you want, so long as you help enough people get what they want first. I’m not sure if that’s always the case, but it’s far more effective than asking people that don’t know you for their; money, time, expertise or influence.
To try and take before you give, is like trying to get heat from a fire, before you build it. It simply leaves you out in the cold!
Jim Connolly can help you grow your business and achieve the breakthrough marketing results your hard work deserves. To find out more, simply click here!
Jim- Could not agree more with this one Mate. Take us for example. You and I met online via twitter and Headway. You and I have reached out first via email and next, we have talked many times via Skype.
The key to social media is to never miss the chance to take the connection to the next level. And to take it to the next possible way of connecting with the person you have met.
BTW, I would drop everything to drive 20 minutes to meet your sorry butt in person. LOL
You make a great point Grant. Thanks for it here sir!
Funny, when I first saw his reply, I thought, “Well, I guess that makes sense.” But then, to your point, extrapolating out on that makes it obvious how silly a response that is.
Thanks for sharing your take on it. : )
Hey Chris. The challenge was less the 20 minute drive and more fact I only had 72 hours advance notice and an insane workload. As I said, I would love to meet with you.
I’ll catch you next time you’re in England. When is that?
UPDATE: Chris, I just realised why your comment got stuck in my filter. It’s because that was your first ever comment here. Is this some new social media strategy – To wait until you’re pissed at someone, before you comment? Welcome to the blog
To be fair, the actual statement, “If I didn’t ask, I wouldn’t know” isn’t a bad form of logic. He just followed through poorly. If you didn’t ask for a raise from your boss after putting in the time, you probably won’t get one randomly. If you didn’t ask someone to marry you, you wouldn’t know their answer. If you didn’t ask your clients what they wanted for their business, you wouldn’t know how to proceed with a project. Asking questions is essential to most things.
But yeah, making demands of strangers is bad. One guy commented on my blog last week asking me to write an extensive review of a kind of software, including three specific products…
Hi Corey. I disagree that “he just followed through poorly”. His approach was unprofessional in every respect.
You give the example of asking someone to marry you. There’s a big difference between asking someone to marry you and asking A TOTAL STRANGER to marry you, which is what his approach was.
Great post Jim, but I would like to add something.
Being as this guy comes from real estate, he should also be aware that his profession goes before him.
I would be ten times more professional than the average guy marketing my stuff, if I was in real estate. You need to break the preconceptions.
You make a good point, Charlie.
There is baggage attached to many professions. When that baggage is negative, it’s vital for the marketer to be extremely aware of this and to be particularly sensitive to the preconceived impressions in his or her marketplace.
Many people in real estate read this blog and comment here. In my experience, they have been superb.
I am the party referenced in the post. Jim’s website/blog had info to email. I did. If that is presumpresumptive then I have missed something about Internet protocol. I happened to stumble upon his info and read about his business.
I was seeking similar and was a bit excited at his proposal. In other words I was a potential client with money to spend.
If he has a protocol which is required, seems to me it should have been disclosed. My approach was exploratory. I have never been accused of being ill mannered or lacking in professional skills. Now I have and I learn.
This seems to be much ado about nothing, or at best a presumption of privilege which I had no way to know.
Life is about choices. We choose how to react. How to interpret the actions of others. Sadly this situation is in reality silly and shallow.
Hi Larry. Thank you for your reply. The post is not about manners. It’s about finding the most effective way to get the best results from other people, when you need/want their help. In my experience, we get the best results when we get to know someone, before asking them to do something for us. I get hundreds of emails every week via this blog, and all (including yours) are very welcome. That’s why I took time out late on a Saturday evening, to reply to your email in person.
Your response is based on the assumption that I needed/wanted help. Sadly the Internet doesn’t always provide a window of time to build an understanding of who is on the other end of the communication.
You have a right to your interpretation.
I think you would have been better served to accept it on its face. In fact the opportunity possibly could have been more important for you than for me. (Emphasis on the possibly.)
I am very comfortable with my approach. I do regret that you were put off with it.
Best….